I Matter....

Funny story.....

I was going through my lists of posts since it has been awhile since I have blogged.

I came across a post entitled..I Matter. It was an unpublished draft.

I couldn't quite remember writing it and since I thought that it sounded interesting I opened it up.

Obviously I did not finish the post since it is literally a cliff hanger.

And now for the life of me I can't remember what it was that I wanted to say.

Isn't old age grand?

I am going to ponder it tonight while I try and sleep

(Isn't old age grand?)

And if I remember what it was that was going to convince me that I MATTER and that you do as well I will get back  to you and write

I Matter part 2.

If any one else feels inspired to finish this clearly inspired post feel free. 

It will be like the game we use to play in elementary school where someone started a story and then it went around in a circle until it's conclusion.

Meanwhile while you are waiting....please believe that I REALLY do think that you and I matter.

Honest.

Sunday, I taught Relief Society for the first time in awhile.
(Relief Society is the LDS organization for women and what a wonderful organization it is)
Thankfully the message I was to deliver is right up my alley and one I feel very passionate about lately.
It really has been on my mind the last two years as I have tried to make a "graceful" (a word not often used to describe me) transition into the next phase in my life.
I have gone from full time mother....
To part time photographer, part time Real estate courier, part time mother (if that is even possible?) and
FULL TIME SHELLLEY!!
That's right full time Shelley is back and for awhile did not know what to do with herself.
The lesson on Sunday answered that question in a beautiful way that really resonated with what I have learned (and NOT the easy way) over the last two years.
I felt so strongly about this message that I gave each woman a challenge (and candy of course...duh)
Was to post within daily site and repeat every day these two words.
I MATTER!
I also asked them to share it with at least one more person because the message needs to be said and felt more than ever in our world.
And so you are the person I want to share it with.
I wish I could sit down with you and share a Route 44 Diet Coke with Cranberry and extra ice....
(and by share I mean you get your drink and I get mine....I don't share my drink with anyone)
and tell you this face to face.
This will have to do.
We spend a LOT of time as human beings on measuring.
We measure our time by seconds, minutes, hours, days and years
We measure our food by meals and standards like small, medium and large and the all important Route 44.
We measure our education by degrees and standardized tests.
We measure our height and weight by the numbers and then classify ourselves into categories of short, thin, fat, average.
We measure our children by the milestones they reach, the grades that they make and the awards they receive.
It's not that measuring is a bad thing
But it can get in our own way.

Watching Paint Dry and Awards

My dear sweet daughter Megan nominated my blog for an award.....

Of course I am sure that there was no bias in the awarding of this honor....

So I gladly accept this wonderful prize and I would like to thank the academy and the foreign film press and my Mom and Dad and all the little people.....
Oh wait there is a little catch.
I have to answer a few questions first to deserve the accolades.
And so here they are...

1. If you had to eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
That's an easy one. I have even given quite a bit of thought to it. Why you ask? This is a question that if asked quickly you do NOT want to get wrong. I have many favorite foods and as you all know sugar tops that list but you have to consider health and wellness if you want to have a "rest of your life". So the answer would have to be bread.
2. What is your favorite memory from college?
That has to be meeting the man of my dreams. Although we grew up in the same stake here in Houston I never laid eyes on him until we met outside my dorm room in Helaman Halls. I can honestly say that I have never met a more handsome, kind, sweet man in my life and I know that we were destined to be together forever
3. If you had to choose a different career (besides teaching and mothering) what would it be?
Lol I think I have already done so......
Hello....PHOTOGRAPHY!!!
But I would be working for National Geographic....dream job!
4. What was your craziest motherhood moment?
There were many....far far too many but the one that springs to mind with you was when I was wheeling you through Target....you were about 2 or 3 years old with quite a vivid imagination and vocabulary. You had been quiet for a few minutes (that should have tipped me off to trouble right there) and I was looking at a pair of scissors, deciding which one to buy. All of a sudden in a very loud voice you cried, "Please Mommy please don't cut me with those scissors!" I quietly put down the scissors and in my sweetest voice (the public sweet voice that let you know you were in real trouble) said out loud to the people staring at us that mommy had NEVER ever cut you with scissors. I could see them all racing to their phones to call CPS.
5. What is your favorite quote and why?
That's is a hard one but recently it has been:
I choose to excel; not compete.
Oh and the classic...When it is your time to go.....Go.
6. What did you want to be when you were a kid?
I knew that I would be an actress like the kids on Brady Bunch.
7. If your life were made into a movie, what would it be called?
"Who would ever pay to go to a movie about my life" That would be the title.
8. If you could interview anyone from any point in history, who would it be?
Eve
9. If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?
Champ
10. What compliment do you receive the most often?
What a wonderful daughter I have.
Go read her blog at meganarratives.blogspot.com

The Two New Men in my Life

What's new?
Well.....I will just come out and admit it.
There are two new men in my life.
There I said it.
Feels good to have it all out in the open.
One is a sea-faring man, an officer whose nutty ways always bring a smile to my face.
The other is sleek, dark and handsome with an ability to bring sunshine and music into my life.
I had always thought that "mid-life" crisis relationships were only for men. I didn't even realize that I was looking for them until they appeared in my life like ships that pass in the night.
Let me just dispense with the suspense and introduce you.
Mystery Man #1

The Cap'n

I wish that I knew what power this old man has over me lately. Heck I don't even think that he is even officially in the military. He doesn't call himself Captain Crunch but Cap'n.....suspicious.  The missing finger is a problem and well I have never been big on a man with facial hair.... Growing up my mother always bought Cap'n Crunch cereal as I suspect it was what could be purchased the cheapest. I didn't even like it then. I would usually just dig around in the box, pull out all the crunch berries and see if there was some prize to be had.

But doggone it.....This is ALL I want to eat anymore.

I think my record is 9....

Nine straight days of peanut butter Cap'n Crunch for dinner.

I hear whispers behind my back  from my children about a possible "crunchervention" being planned.

I find myself wanting alone time so that the Cap'n and I could meet without the stares and comments.

"Cap'n Crunch AGAIN??"

Todd offers all the time to take me out to dinner....anywhere I want......but truly this is my manna.

This is what I want.

I am fully blaming peri-menopause for this one.

That and the fact that after 50 years of not eating hamburgers, the only thing that can entice me away from my maritime friend is a western bacon cheeseburger at Smashburger.

I have always despised peanut butter, ground beef and barbeque sauce....the very three foods which are currently keeping me alive.

Mystery man number 2 you ask?

Black Jack

My new car.

Yes he is a guy.

Todd said that it was impossible and that all cars are girls but he is wrong.

This guys a dude! I am positive as I checked under the hood.

What is strange about this new man in my life is that I didn't even know that I wanted him.

I have always been apathetic about my mode of transportation, even going so far as to look down a little on others who went on and on about a certain make or model. Never wanting a vehicle to be a status symbol which represented me, I always said, "All I need is for a car to be reliable, take me from point A to point B, and have air conditioning. (which in Houston is not a frivolous request but an actual necessity)  

So when it came time to get a new vehicle the conversation went like this:

Todd: Well what kind of car do you want?

Me: I don't care...whatever.

Todd: Really?

Me: Well I am sick of driving around in an empty van. I feel like a sad retired school bus driver with no children. My voice echoes when I sing along with the radio.

Todd: Are we ready to make the leap to only having sedans? What if we need to haul something? How will we take everyone places when they come to visit?

Me: I don't want to haul anything and they will just have to bring their own cars.

Todd: What about camera equipment?

Me: Valid point....SUV then?

Todd: Great! What kind of SUV then?

Me: Oh I don't care....whatever is the best price and reliable.........

and...........

a sun roof.

(Here is where I start to become a different person....one theory.....recent change of diet)

and American made.....

Ford perhaps.....

And definitely not white but any other color....

Or maybe grays and blacks.....

A few weeks later I find myself negotiating with the slick used car salesman Abraham...

I stride in and before I even shake his hand I say,

I want a Ford Escape 2011 or newer....black.....dark interior......under 25,000 miles and it has to have a sunroof. And I won't pay more than 19,000 Do you have that??

Nope? 

See ya!

Who am I???

As I evaluate my sudden interest in cars over a bowl of crunchy cereal I realize that I need to just go to Todd and tell him to buy me whatever is the most reliable car, that gets me from point A to point B and has air conditioning for the best price he can find.

He smiles and says, "we will find something."

That sweet man found me Black Jack.

And it is everything I asked for.

2012,Ford Explorer, black, sleek, sexy and the sun shines on my head as I go from point A to point B.

So is Todd worried about the two new men in my life?

How could he?

With a man like this...

There is NEVER any competition.