PB&J the right way

I ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch today.
In a nod to my mother I cut it the way she did.
Across and not diagonal.
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Growing up I didn't appreciate that she cut it that way.
All of the "cool kids" had their sandwich cut on the diagonal.
I am not sure if I asked my mom to do it differently
or
I suffered in silence
but it was a hardship for me nonetheless.
And that was not the only problem I faced.
All of the other cool kids had really cool lunches...
individual chip bags like Cheetos and Doritos.
Twinkies, Ding Dongs, and my personal favorite. HoHos
each little roll wrapped up in a blanket of aluminum foil
which could be carefully flattened out and used to create fanciful foil designs.
I did not get those coveted items.
My lunch had
a sandwich,
a plastic baggie of chips created from a bigger family sized bag of chips,
and a homemade cupcake, which presented the biggest of my lunch time woes.
Everyone knows that the frosting is the most important part of any cupcake
In fact the cake is really only the vehicle used to transport the creamy frosting goodness to your mouth.
Well when you put a frozen cupcake in a baggie it initially looks fine
but after sitting in a hot paper bag for a few hours it is not.
As I would sit at my cafeteria table and pull out my cupcake
it was like a cupcake massacre had been committed.
The frosting was smeared all over the inside of the baggie.
In an attempt to get all of it's lusciousness I was forced to turn the plastic baggie inside out on my fist
and lick it off,
like a big fist shaped frosting glove.
It was not only embarrassing but the smell of plastic mixed with frosting
still haunts me to this day.
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My own children were given EVERY lunch delicacy that Kroger could provide.
If there was a new lunch type item to hit the market.
It was in a Winn kids lunch first.
Gushers, Cakesters, Fruit by the Foot, Little Debbies, Pringles, Twinkies, Snack Stix, Ding Dongs, Pop Tarts, Mini cookies.......
The other children at the table marveled at the uniqueness of their fare.
When I told my children about the hardships I had endured
and the shame of my frosting glove,
they said....Oooo I would like cupcakes.
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I actually did learn years later why my mom cut my sandwich like that.
It is easier to put it in a baggie.
Thanks Mom.